In today's era when everything is so superficial, Love too has not been able to stay away from it. The "need" of being loved, the need to show it to the world that you are indeed being "loved" has taken away all the sweetness from love. Because this brings in a constant and never ending chase of proving that you love them. And by proving, it doesn't mean proving for them, but proving it to the world that my spouse loves me oh-so-much. The trick part is, in order to do that you need to prove it the way world does it. That completely takes away the real meaning behind love and just ends up making it a demonstration.
But that's about expression of love.
Why people are afraid of love:
But that's about expression of love.
Why people are afraid of love:
- It changes people. I do not want to change. I have spent ~20 years after becoming self conscious to define myself, and no Love had no part in it. It was always only a barrier. Now i am expected to "love" my spouse the way rest of the world loves theirs. I have put love in quotes because apparently affection, caring, helping, supporting, alienating does not count.
- Love involves emotions. Its not easy for me to handle emotions. Emotions make me dumb. I always end up faking the emotions that are "apparent definition" of love.
- It makes me lie. All the little lies to make someone happy. I feel miserable in knowing that my spouse needs these tiny lying words of approval to be happy. That my spouse does not have any strength to face the truth.
- It asks you to be vulnerable. After all those years of living by yourself and handling every situation to the best, love expects you to "un-evolve", "un-learn" the best that you have learned and be vulnerable again. WTF!!!
- It asks you to put trust in the judgement of a person whom you have come to know (after all these years), is incapable of producing a solution the problem.
- Love is irrational, illogical, doesn't help people who have already overcome their weakness.
- They say love a person better than yourself. But nobody bothers about what happens to the better person. That better person has to become a "good" person from a "better" person in order to come midway to help their partners become a better person. The "better-half" has to un-evolve to become just the "good-half".
- Love is a politically correct term for weak to piggy back on stronger ones and be selfish about it. (people who claim that love means giving back, you should probably note that the stronger one probably doesn't need what the weaker has to offer. )
- Love is disguised lust. Lets face it, love at first sight, Love after a week of online chatting... what the hell is that?
It's lust, but hey lust is a "bad" word to lets camouflage it in the name of love and do all sorts of idiotic things. - Real love does not expect you to change, It retains your identity and your spouses.
- Real love does not asks you to adjust, it lets you to be who you are and lets your spouse to be who they are.
- Real love does not force you to find a middle ground when there is none.
